smittenbyu | April 9: Parenthood... (Reply)

Next time someone says, "Come work part time!" run the other way! Unless of course, you are open to working more hours. And then you will scramble to find a babysitter (or some form of childcare which you will hope will be safe for your child and give 30-40% of your paycheck to, not counting the contribution to Uncle Sam) and then you will flip and flop over "omg! I didn't want to do this till she starts kindergarten/college! I will miss my child! I am abandoning her! oh no!" to "oh but I love to have that job too!"

But this notion of working part time is neither here nor there... Which leads to the question for April 9: from

sight - What is your favorite thing about being a parent? Worst?

It allows you to be a kid again. You are completely excused for hopping about all silly when the kid is around you. You can sing silly songs. Hey you asked! You can use your child as excuse for not caring about how you dress and being low maintenance earns you praises. Someone, I forget who, had shared with me, being a parent you relive your childhood! Which is often a wonderful thing. It also can be scary as you relive your not so wonderful moments from childhood and you are forced to face your fears and overcome them - as you don't want your kid (who thinks you are a superhero) to see that you can be afraid too!

If human behavior ever interested you, watching and being with kids gives you the most intimate details about our psychologies and it could scare you just as much as the utter mess the world is in makes complete sense.

I get to (re)learn so much about how the world works. How much we take some things for granted. Little things like watching the child discovering gravity, sure it killed my back to pick whatever dropped a hundred times but to see that wonder in the little one being reassured that whatever you let go will come back down. Little things that reading from left to right is learnt. You discover how many rules we have surrounded ourselves in. Being a parent you get to break a few of them, because you are with a child!

But mostly to see human perseverance in your child, falling, picking up oneself, trying again and again. Not taking no as an acceptable answer. Keeps me motivated and inspires me to be better person not just for my kid but also for myself!

I really get to know hubby and his idiosyncracies and how we both work/don't work. Having a kid can strengthen and also weaken a marriage. Yeeks... we have our issues but we have our fun too!

And the worst part?

Scared shitless about how much responsibility falls on my shoulders. That I might somehow screw it all up and mess her up! That OMG she depends completely on us!

That these past 5 years were the fun years and the biggest obstacles are yet to come as she slowly grows up and realises that we are not really superheroes! ;)

And I can't enjoy a hot cup of tea. It will always be the time she goes to poop! And that leads to another fact that I have never (hopefully never again) followed/watched/discussed another person's pooping habits/patterns like I did my daughter's!!!!

and the struggle to balance my own self-identity with all the roles I have to play (although I think this is true even for those without kids; it's just another big thing as someone else relies completely on you!)